haven got the motivation to blog recently.. especially when i see the dying tagboard that i have.. its very sian to see that.. probably there is nothing people can say when they read my blog. hahas. Boring blog entries i assume.

Anyways.. just realised i stopped blogging since last thursday? Probably that's the reason for me blogging now.. Might be a long one though.. if you are bored, just stop reading alright. thanks.

Friday

Few of the west people came to my house at night as the 2 huis will be performing for the youth meeting on Saturday afternoon.. Was slightly annoyed as i was doing my own stuff at first. but well, joined them in the end.. they started singing..

den Jiahui ended up dying her hair.. and i ended up being a cook.. at the end of the night, everyone was kinda worn out by the expressions that they have.

Saturday

Sh came to my house in the noon..again.. to practise for the singing again.. I cant sing at all.. felt a little discouraged cause i really like to sing when i listen to the songs that i like. But well, everyone has their own talents. Somehow i don know mine. CAnt really see the things that i can do, well.. Hopefully i can see myself doing something that is useful.. ): Sighs.

Anyways, when we were about to leave, JH's friend, Zhi Yang, reached my house too..Super tall guy!!! I thought he was standing on the steps, but he was not!! OMG!!!

Anyways.. we all went to meet Kenny at the carpark.. Took the front seat, kinda like it cause i can be quiet.

Started crapping when we reached expo already.. Had an interesting conversation with Zhi Yang man! Enjoyed talking to him! Went for lunch after awhile.. really had a great time with him.. Very gentleman and nice, quiet yet interesting guy..^^

I also had to meet up with another 2 friends i think. both JH's friends.. only one turned up, and he is none other than Yong Gao..was quite afraid to meet him at first though.. he sounded a little fierce when i called him.. hahas! But when i met him, it turned out to be different. He's soooo nice, funny and interesting..^^

There wasnt any time when we stopped talking i think. And Zhi Yang had someone else to talk to i think.. LUis or Kit i think. anyways.. it was a great time with them..

After that.. it was service.. Zhi Yang didnt join us.. but Yong Gao joined us!! Woohoo!! hahas..

And yes, the service was great..Rev Stephen Munsey is really a very creative and relational pastor! He didnt just share words.. but he literally acted out the story of Hosea.. Seriously, it was great.. i was really blown away by the story! its just so cool.. The love of God just kept flowing while the story was going on.. You can just sense it so tangibly and everything seemed so real..Even I, was truly touched by the drama despite hearing lots of stories about love in the Bible.Thanks Pastor for bring such and impactful sermon or revelation to CHC last week.. Really touched and appreciated the content of it!

Went to the airport for fellowship.. hahas. sat with Yong Gao, with JH and Kit... had another of sharing.. Jokes and stuff. hahas.. Oh yes, we shared about scary stuff and my experiences in the hospitals during my attachments and school.. hahas..

Sunday

Went for cgm as we missed the men and ladies meeting on friday.. Short word about knowing who we actually are in Christ and among people.. Well.. i really don know what's good about me.. Hahas.. Anyways, tried to catch the Sunday service online.. wasnt that successful as the connection suddenly dropped halfway through the service.. ):

Anyways, had fellowship at the Mcdonalds.. share a little about the upcoming camp and the previous camps that we had. was a great fellowship.. really..^^

Went on fellowshipping with Kenny and Daniel at Jurong Point.. went to Starbucks, had dinner at KFC.. 2 meals of fast food in a day!! OMG!

But that's all for the day..

Monday

Had a short day in school.. got a short and sweet birthday celebration for Shane and Peiying..but went off after awhile to meet Zhiyang and company for lunch with JH.. Think i made a fool of myself making all the unglam jokes and stuff in front of ZhiYang and his friends.. but hopefully they enjoyed that short time of fellowship, cause i really did!!!

Together with JH, went to gym with Kenny, Daniel, Luis, SH at Jurong West. somehow i felt really weird with them.. really.. suddenly a thought snapped into my mind, " Should i join them for any fellowship next time?" Feel as though i am not in the group..feel so weird..uneasy. its different from last time.. the easy and comfortable group of people that i would call them as friends.

Anyways, went for supper, and went to JP again to do something for my dad.

TUesday

Well, today was a VERY LONG day.. i am freaking tired... i am dead serious. i kept falling asleep during lectures..cant stand it.. EVen while i was talking to my friends over lunch, i just felt my heavy lids trying to drop.. That's how tired i am, physically and emotionally.. anyways,, had a last min meet-up with Yong Gao.. hangout at AMK.. had dinner at Sumo House and stuff.. laughing the entire time.. slacked at AMKHub to have our food digested.. but feeling very bad cause i cant meet Kelvin and Kay for the movie. i am broke!!! so yea. Anyways, really enjoyed myself with the company of Yong Gao and JH.

Hopefully will meet up and hang out like this again..^^

Been tired of meeting people.. tired of having negative thinkings that i am sick of.. seriously.. Tired of hiding myself from reality..yet at the same time, i am starting to meet people.. hahas.. isnt that contradicting?

But wells, i think.. i really need to do something to settle my heart and my thoughts.. There isnt any that i can really share my heart out anyway..so probably jus keep it this way..

"How much do i mean to people? Who am i to those whom i called friends?"- thoughts i have these days. Unhealthy, but yes.. even those people who are supposed to protect me, they just make me feel like i am no longer important. Pathetic.

Going back to being myself.. hiding..maybe i should stop expecting..

iDestinee.